Riding the roller coaster

I saw my tumours yesterday. I drove myself to Edmonton for a post therapy scan and a follow up consultation with one of the doctors. He showed me the results of the scan and there they were, lit up on the screen like mini suns; one in my colon, two on my liver and a little one in a lymph node in the middle of my abdomen. That was the good news. It meant that the mIBG that I was given on Friday had, in fact, adhered to the tumours and was beginning to do battle with them.

Unfortunately, there was also bad news. A CT scan of my head and neck, done prior to my treatment on Friday, shows that I also have a growth in the left side of my face. They were unsure about that one after the initial diagnostic tests. Unfortunately, it did not light up on yesterday’s scan which means that, unlike my other growths, it’s not receptive to mIBG and it isn’t presently being treated.

It does appear to be receptive to Lutetium, however, but that’s a newer radioisotope treatment that isn’t presently being funded by the government. The Cross is in the process of setting up a clinical trial that will give them funding for Lutetium but it takes time to wade through the red tape involved in that. It should be available for use early in the new year but it would have been so much better if my facial tumour had been receptive to both medications. That would have given us more in the arsenal to fight with. Apparently, due to it’s location, it isn’t a good candidate for surgical removal either.

I’ve heard it said that having cancer is like riding a roller coaster and now I understand. I had crawled to the top of a hill and was feeling great; then came the sudden drop!

Perhaps today is a good day to remind myself of the things that cancer cannot do.

What Cancer Cannot Do

Cancer is so limited…

It cannot cripple
LOVE

It cannot shatter
HOPE

It cannot corrode
FAITH

It cannot destroy
PEACE

It cannot kill
FRIENDSHIP

It cannot suppress
MEMORIES

It cannot silence
COURAGE

It cannot invade the
SOUL

It cannot steal
ETERNAL LIFE

It cannot conquer
THE SPIRIT

Author Unknown

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28 thoughts on “Riding the roller coaster

  1. My prayers are with you today, friend. May He comfort you with His love, and bring strength to your body, encouragement and peace to your spirit, and sweet fellowship with Him.

  2. That statement re. “What Cancer Cannot Do” is so excellent, isn’t it, Elaine? We have it hanging on the wall on our chemotherapy unit here in YK. Bless you for your honesty with your feelings. Blake and I send our love and support as always.
    Maureen xox

    • Thank you, Mo! I try to be real about my feelings on here. Writing helps me digest what’s going on and I also want the blog to be a useful tool for communicating with family, friends and anyone else who’s interested.

      I remembered your advice about advocating for myself instead of sitting back waiting and worrying so I put in a call today to try to get more information about what’s going on in my face. Hopefully more information will give more peace.

  3. I felt the ride of your roller coaster tonight as I read this Elaine,although I know it is just a fraction of what the real thing must feel like. I was so happy to read about the tumours lighting up like you wanted to see and then to read about the other one not. It must be so very hard.

    I hope it helps just a little bit to know that there are so many of us praying for you. Thank you for sharing this with us so we know exactly what we need to be praying for today. Praying praying praying.

  4. Not good news. Cancer is so cruel. You have such a positive attitude and I know the Lord is pleased. Each morning on my early walk, you are prayed for with love and thanksgiving for your friendship and life of serving the Lord. Praying for complete healing and peace for you and Richard. Love to both!

  5. As MJ said, words seem futile but they allow us the opportunity to send support and let you know that we are thinking and praying for you.

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